They didn’t made it onto the podium, but here are our alternative winners of this year’s Olympics

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Now that the Olympics are drawing to a close, it’s time to sit back and take stock of all the action from the past couple of weeks.

Sure, sprint finishes and podium places are what we tend to remember, but there are also some other people who deserve recognition. So we’ve devised an alternative honours list: giving credit where credit’s due.

Gold for: Most painful pole vault.

On Saturday Japanese athlete Hiroki Ogita attempted to qualify for the Men's Pole Vault at Rio 2016, all because of… pic.twitter.com/b9fXiJu2U5

— ELMENS (@elmensmag) August 16, 2016

Poor Hiroki Ogita. There’s nothing worse than missing out on your Olympic dream. Except, of course, if your manhood gets painfully in the way of the bar as you try to pole vault. That might be worse.

It probably doesn’t help that the whole world has been watching it on repeat in slow motion.

Japanese pole vaulter Hiroki Ogita' dream crushed by…
…His phallus caused him to foul during qualifying rounds. pic.twitter.com/hrubYFv1xB

— rodriQuez (@rodriQuez) August 16, 2016

We feel your pain Hiroki, we really do.

Gold for: Best pre-race ritual.

Santo Condorelli gives his father the finger as a good luck ritual before every race. Amazing. #Rio2016 #teamcanada pic.twitter.com/pXsfV1b1aY

— Ash Dwight (@ashdwight) August 9, 2016

Santo Condorelli traditionally flips his dad the bird before every race, and his dad gives it right back to him. N’aww, familial love.

Gold for: Best supporter.

(Chris Radburn/PA)

This has to go to Olympic Nan. Her grandson Adam Peaty may have won a gold medal, but it was 74-year-old Mavis Williams who won our hearts.

Her Twitter bio reads “Proud Nan to a World Champion Breaststroker” and she pretty much reminds us of all our own grandmothers.

What race oooo I'm so proud he ,s a gladiator well done @adam_peaty @cazliz123 @britishswimming 👏👏👏🍀🍀🇬🇧🇬🇧

— Mavis (@Mavise42Mavis) August 7, 2016

Gold for: Best facial expressions.

(John Walton/PA)

Synchronised swimming is perhaps not everyone’s cup of tea, but it’s got to be said that those swimmers sure know how to pull bizarre faces.

(John Walton/PA)

So. Much. Feeling.

(Matt Dunham/AP)

They also win our gold for some of the most ridiculous outfits.

I thought it was @twentyonepilots #SynchronisedSwimming
@tylerrjoseph @joshuadun pic.twitter.com/g6cS4DJ3ji

— Isabella |-/ (@IzzieTheUnicorn) August 14, 2016

Gold for: Most outrageous press conference.

This is how the Usain Bolt press conference ended. That's him in the middle. Tell me he ain't winning in #Rio2016. pic.twitter.com/Cac9NjOyaT

— Jesse Washington (@jessewashington) August 8, 2016

If someone was going to bring pomp and circumstance to the Games, it was going to be Bolt. And boy did he deliver: instead of running a normal press conference he put on what was essentially a celebration of himself, complete with a conga line. We expect nothing less from the fastest man on earth.

Gold for: Best surprise appearance.

Zac Efron surprising the Final Five #ZacEfron #FinalFive #SimoneBiles #LaurieHernandez pic.twitter.com/A3Te4aAS2o

— Rachel (@sparkles_chalk) August 17, 2016

Everyone is obsessed with Simone Biles right now. All of us have watched her performances with awe, and have briefly considered pursuing a career in gymnastics (but then realising that we can’t even do a roly-poly so it’s probably a no-go). We’d be completely star-struck to meet her – but who would Biles freak out at meeting herself?

proof : had to do a retake bc I thought we were taking a picture then he kissed me instead ❤️ pic.twitter.com/rld33V14qe

— Simone Biles (@Simone_Biles) August 16, 2016

Turns out, it’s Zac Efron. And it’s really quite adorable.

Gold for: Best boomerang throw.

300 years later and I will still be laughing at sun yang throwing his cap in the pool #YaBlewItSunYang pic.twitter.com/OAVS5wA4dM

— Christy (@_cc96) August 9, 2016

We’re assuming that Chinese swimmer Sun Yan meant to throw his cap into the crowd, but unfortunately for him it didn’t quite go to plan. Our favourite bit is watching him scurry back to pick up the hat – that’s got to put a bit of a downer on your celebration.

Gold for: Best fanboy moment.

Mark Cavendish Interrupts Live BBC Interview With Sir Chris Hoy To Ask For Autograph #cycling #olympics pic.twitter.com/EqULwuNTlq

— GranFondoGuide (@GranFondoGuide) August 15, 2016

What a year it’s been for British cycling. However, in this list we want to give props to Mark Cavendish not for his riding, but for successfully crashing Chris Hoy’s interview to ask for an autograph.

Gold for: Best hair.

(Kirsty Wigglesworth/AP)

This has to go to Jamaican athlete Shelly-Ann Fraser-Pryce, whose dedication to her country’s colours is so impressive that it’s reflected in the yellow and green ombre of her hair.

💛💚 Shelly-Ann Fraser-Pryce 💛💚 (photo by AFP / OLIVIER MORIN) pic.twitter.com/kHxnRDnrfE

— Team Jamaica (@JamaicaOlympics) August 13, 2016

American swimmer Ryan Lochte is definitely not on the podium for this prize, after bleaching his hair and it accidentally going an interesting shade of turquoise in the pool.

I don't think @RyanLochte realizes what chlorine does to bleach blonde hair. Get a good purple toning shampoo sweetie! 😘

— Sasha Allison (@sashaallison127) August 10, 2016

Gold for: Best selfie.

Best photo from #Rio2016: gymnasts from North and South Korea taking a selfie pic.twitter.com/Qm9m7EXWEV

— Valerio De Cesaris (@ValerioDeC) August 10, 2016

This has got to go to the gymnasts from North and South Korea. Hong Un-jong from North Korea and Lee Eun-ju from South Korea took a heartwarming selfie together, despite their countries being at war.

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